Sunday, March 30, 2008


Rebecca and Matt are Mauied!
It's official--the whole band is hooked up. One third of the band is in the parental way (the bass player and his wife welcomed a new daughter recently). The other third is knocked up (that would be the guitar player and his wife).

It was a gorgeous day. Basically, the weather on Maui cooperated the entire time. It gets a bit windy, but that can help to keep the heat down (and the hair flying).

Pete had breakfast with the groom in the morning, and then came back to the condo to clean up, then off again to Matt's folks' house to groom with the groomsmen.

I think he cleans up rather well.
He's certainly MY best man...
OK, enough of that.

Pete took a few snapshots of the men getting ready. I'll spare you Matt in the towel with the shades on. For now. I will substitute this equally sexy shot:
Weddings are a very solemn occasion, and I am glad to see that these young men were handling it as such.

While they were horsing around, I was back at the condo. This was my first time being the significant other of a participant in a wedding, and I have to say: not that much fun. This is also my first time being the pregnant significant other of a participant of a wedding, and I have to say: extra-depressing not that much fun.

I don't have much (or any) control over my emotional state right now, and I seem to be easily plunged into a blue-grey space of moody contemplation. It's not that there is anything really wrong, I am just sensitive. While Pete went through his "Wow, my whole life is going to be different" phase four months ago, I am going through it now, but it's "Wow, my whole life already is different, and this is just the beginning." It's not a phase.

Being out and about among the people brought it all into sharp focus. All my restrictions are right there, in my face, whereas at home, I can keep them away and at bay; my choices are limited to the stuff I can do and have. The other stuff is not around.

I got ready and headed up to the resort. The one thing I can say about being by myself is that I was on time, meaning half an hour early. I had the camera bag and Pete's guitar, Lily, with me, and I needed to find a place to stow her for the ceremony, which meant finding my husband. It was all so weird; I am used to being with him in unfamiliar places. Heck, I am just used to being with him--we arrive at events together. It's one of the many nice things about being married. At least, it's one of the many nice things about being married to someone you like.

Luckily, I found Pete right away in the expansive white marble lobby, and he walked with me down to the ceremony site. He was already a couple of Mai Tais into his day, and that put me a couple of Mai Tais into my already glum gloominess.

The ceremony was short and sweet. Rebecca's grandfather conducted part of it, and a Hawaiian minister took the rest. Matt got all teary when he saw his gorgeous bride coming down the hill, and it's always nice to see two people in love like that.

She did look great, and her mom made the dress.
At the reception, I ordered the Filet, medium rare, against all restrictions, but I was feeling like I wanted to cry, and I could not bear to add a well-done piece of meat onto that (the other two choices were fish). I was feeling so alienated from the situation and from the self I was used to being. Of course, I could not eat the whole thing, delicious as it was, because I felt guilty.

It's weird to realize that you are, in one way, not the person you were. As I have said before, I am not changed in essentials; my character remains the same, but this is a concrete marker. It's not necessarily bad, but it's not entirely good--it's something that I have to get used to. Marrying Pete did not change anything other than being able to call him my husband and having the psychological confirmation of a commitment and a future. This is a whole other animal.


And it's squirming around in my belly.

The festivities wrapped up at around 11 o'clock, and there were no mishaps aside from the groom spilling red wine all over his rented (white) vest and shirt. Earlier in the day, the wedding rings went missing for a short period of time, but they had been in the possession of the flower girl and were easily recovered. Pete did not get a chance to play the guitar, as it was not that kind of reception, but our wedding playlists on our iPod came in handy once again.

All in all, I do believe that the bride and groom were happy with the day, and that's what matters after all. They are certainly happy together.

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