Girl Rules

There are certain Girl Rules that I understand perfectly:

Be nice to the new girlfriend of an ex boyfriend with whom you are on good terms.

Be nice to the new girlfriend of a guy friend.

Don't sleep with your girlfriend's ex boyfriends if they are on the "Do Not Sleep With" list. (It's always best to check first)

TELL your friend if she has something stuck in her teeth or hanging out of her nose.

Don't let her leave the house if you think her outfit makes her look crazy or retarded.

Don't toss over girlfriends for boyfriends.

These seem obvious and logical. Granted, we don't always follow them to a tee in our twenties, but thereafter, we should have gotten it together. The other Girl Rules, the ones that depend upon fashion and seasons and "In" vs. "Out" baffle me because they do not adhere to sense. All I want is a red dress for our May 20 Wedding Party here in Minneapolis.

I went into a boutique called "Local Motion" in which we have had Good Dress Luck in previous years, and the owner asked what I was looking for. "A red dress." "Oooh," she said, looking at me as if I was a three year old who was being told that there were no more lollipops, and I would have to settle for lemon drops. (mmmmm... lemon drops). "You really won't find a red dress in Spring. Maybe a casual sundress in Summer, but..."

She really was perfectly nice, but I was just not aware of this rule. I know the whole white after Labor Day thing, but that's about it. I will, of course, prove her wrong. First stop, the best little vintage dress shop in town, called "Lula"...